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My Uber Driver became My Life Coach! (Follow Your Yellow Brick Road – Part 2)

I like utilizing Uber for the convenience of the service; plus, I enjoy engaging on a personal level with people even if it is just for a brief moment.  Not having at least a basic conversation with my Uber driver is just awkward for me.  Now I respect if they do not want to converse; but more times than not they are just as ready for a good conversation as I am.  And I have had many great conversations.  On a recent trip, however, my Uber experience went to the next level.  In the middle of a thought-provoking conversation about life (yep on a 6 mile trip) my Uber driver Anthony ask me these insightful questions.

20+ years from now how do you envision your life?
How does that life feel?

Wow!  I love getting deep but I was not ready for this.  I am trying to envision what my life will be like next year.  So, I paused, I smiled and then started searching my brain for an answer.  It went so fast I think I said something like enjoying life with my husband(currently not in a relationship) while continuing to grow individually and as a couple; living 4 months of the year in Europe and blah blah blah….

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If you read the ‘Follow Your Yellow Brick Road – Part 1’ blog post you already know that I am on this find your passion and live your truth journey.  I have been working on my passion roadmap and my passion plans.  These are exercises in the Passion Planner which is a planning tool that helps you break down your short and long-term goals and incorporate them in your daily life.  Thus, I have my 3 month, 1 year, 3 years, lifetime wish list which you only have 5 minutes to write down.  If you have never heard of the Passion Planner check it out (www.passionplanner.com).  It may surprise you what you can dream up in 5 minutes!  I am not getting paid to endorse.

My Passion Roadmap – Dreams/Wish list

3 Years Wish List:  travel, write a book, learn photography, speak 5 languages fluently, married, on the path to owning a successful business

Lifetime Wish List:  direct a film, travel to every country, own a second home in Europe, multi-millionaire, coach and help others realize their dreams

Anthony’s questions made me realize; I have not consciously looked at my goals as a connected collage and visualized how my life would look or better yet how it would feel once I reached my goals.  This could be because I am a big believer that the true joy is in the journey/process of achieving my personal goals.  My wish lists and goals may change as I grow and evolve.  However, the conversation with Anthony got me thinking deeper about how the individual goals that I choose to work on will shape my life now and in the distant future.  What value will these goals bring to myself and others once I achieve them?

I do not want my short and long-term goals to just turn into a new form of consumption. Replacing buying shiny objects with the acquisition of goals and achievements.  You know, not being fulfilled several months after you achieve a goal because the thrill or experience of achieving the goal is over.  Just like sometimes you forget about that new toy that you just had to buy but it is sitting in your closet not being used.  I acknowledge that some of my goals have turned into a form of consumption.  This scares me.

Some of the big themes in this modern digital ecosystem is to Grind and Hustle.  Those words are all over social media.  Do not get me wrong.  I truly believe in working hard.  I will always have dreams and goals.  They keep me excited.  They keep me feeling youthful.  I also believe that without focus, dedication and some sense of hustle and grind I will not achieve these goals.  And, I hope to God that the journey and the process will continue to bring me joy!  If it doesn’t, I am on the wrong path to my destination.  I just realize now that I need to start learning how to view my goals in a more connected mindset.  Once I achieve them, than what?  How will I use them before I move on to the next and the next…..

I am not going to front and pretend that I have the 12 step life plan.  I will definitely share when I figure it out or when someone decides to share it with me!

I am curious if you have ever ask yourself these questions?

Are you replacing material consumption with the hustle and the grind life?
What do you envision your life to be like after you achieve your goals?
Do you view your individual goals with a connected mindset?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Follow Your Yellow Brick Road – Part 1

The American Dream

For a long time in our developed society, we have been programmed to believe that our path in life is linear.  There is only one golden yellow brick road to fulfilment and success.  If we checked off the boxes on that yellow brick road; we will lead a good life.  We will be happy or at least satisfied.  This was the simple navigational guide.  Our companies, education system and government… were designed to support this narrative and guide us through life.  Sometimes the path looked more like this with hills and valleys.

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Hills and Valley

Born→Primary School→College→Linear Career→Marriage/Kids→Retire→Die

Don’t forget to accumulate lots of stuff while you are during the above♥

Was everyone happy? No!  However, the majority of the population knew what was expected of them.  So there had to be something wrong with you if you did everything on the list and was still not happy.  Per my parents; what does happiness have to do with anything.  Believe in God, get a job (college was a privilege), care for yourself and family, deal!  That should make you happy.

Find Your Passion & Than Choose Your Own Path

Well mom and dad, I want to do more than just deal.  I drank the Kool Aid (cherry).  I bought into the “Find Your Passion” movement.  I want to travel through life on MY yellow brick road not THE yellow brick road.

I expected at this point in my life that I would have it all figured out.  I would know my ultimate truths and would be actively living them daily.  As much Oprah and Brene Brown I listen too, I should have an honorary doctorate in my truths by now.  Unfortunately, I do not.  Scratch that – I know my core truths.

  • My core truth is that I am a creator
  • I want to bring significant value to the world
  • I want to help others realize their greatness too

Wow, I said that out load!  However, I have been afraid to acknowledge and live that best life.  Creators and people who bring significant value to the world are super heroes to me.

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When I was a kid, I dreamed of being a dancer.  Dancing was my happy place. I came alive on stage.  I am an introvert and as a child I confused that with being shy.  I was not shy.  I also had a speaking impediment.  Dancing was my creative outlet and the way I communicated to the world.  I told life stories through my dance and through the bond of human emotion people understood what was being said.  I did not have to verbally speak.

I was the youngest of six kids.  I was the first child with the opportunity to graduate from university.  My parents sacrificed and worked really hard to give me this opportunity.  I took many dance classes in College but I could not bring my self to major in dance.  I majored in business.  It was my choice.  I just could not justify having my father who had to drop out of college to support a family and my mother who did not graduate high school during manual labor to pay for a degree in Dance.

This was just one of many choices that veered me from my creative path.  Or so I thought.😌  These choices do not change my ultimate destiny.  They just interrupt how I am getting there.

This post is titled Part 1 because it is Part 1 of many.  How many, I don’t know yet.  As many as it takes to get this thing right.  Or right for me.  What did Trump say, he did not know that Healthcare was hard.  Well, this whole live your life purpose is hard too.  I want to use the “Follow Your Yellow Brick Road’ series as a place to explore how to live my Purpose in this capitalistic Digital Age always connected world.

I hope you stay with me on my journey.  If you already got this Purpose thing figured out.  Please leave a comment below and share.  I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

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Stop Trying to Convince Me That Working Until I am 70 years old Is The Best Thing Ever.

As I am navigating through this thing called life and trying to decide what’s next (move to a new city, country or explore a new career).  I have been thinking a lot about retirement.  People say that once your work is your passion; your work no longer feels like a job.  You will never have a desire to retire.  Well, girlfriend is not at that place yet.

My career has been successful so far.  I have truly enjoyed all of my many work opportunities and the people whom I have worked with over the years.  However, Monday has never been my favorite day of the week.  Unless a holiday falls on a Monday.    Sunday night comes and I realize week after week that there never is enough time to explore all of the other important things in life I enjoy but do not generate an income.  So even though I am not near traditional retirement age.  And I am open to the idea of discovering a new passion and earning a living doing it until the day I die.  I have been DREAMING a lot about RETIREMENT and during it early.

In my super hero mind I am this spontaneous and bohemian carefree person who moves fluently through life but at the core I know I am a planner.  Although, I veer from those plans sometimes.  A girl still likes a good plan.  A starting point.  Thus, the researching, goal setting and planning began.

DREAM, SET A GOAL OR VISION, PLAN, EXECUTE, REVISE!

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I always like to start with questions. Will I ever be able to retire? What will it take for me to retire?  I forgot to share with you that these questions are being ask by a recovering workaholic.  A person who missed her flight to Spain because I was at home working instead of getting to the airport on time.  Yes, my sister who was meeting me in Amsterdam so we could catch the flight to Spain together was PISSED!

First Question: Will I ever be able to retire? YES!
Second Question: When do I want to retire? TODAY…LOL not possible.

You see, I just discovered the FIRE (Financially Independent Retire Early) movement.  I will not be able to retire at the new TRENDY age of 30.  I am a Gen. Xer and 30 has come and gone.  However, I know that I do not want to ‘HAVE TO’ work until the age of 70 either which Social Security and most old school financial advisors recommend to maximize investments.  I want to retire somewhat early which for me means around 55.  More importantly than the exact age of retirement is achieving the financial independence to do so if I so desire.

I am not going to go into financial steps to retirement here. I am not a personal financial expert.  There are a ton of sites that can walk you through the roadmap to retirement.  I simply want to start the dialog on the desire to retire early and being okay to live in that truth.  You see, I am often taken back by the amount of people who look at me crazy when I say that I want to retire early.  Yes, surprisingly I get negative comments, doubt that it is even possible and ‘eye rolling’ like who do you think you are.  But the biggest surprise is when they ask

“What would you do with all your time?”
“Aren’t you going to be bored?”
“I mean, how much traveling do you really want to do?”

PEOPLE, I agree work is important!  You gotta eat.  And it does bring some satisfaction to the soul.  But there is more to life than just working .  Why is our identity so attached to career and work in this society?  This is something that I am asking myself because I am guilty of it.  So, a question that began with how can I retire early has led me to a bigger question of how can we start identifying ourselves by who we are instead of what we do to make money.

When you meet someone for the first time and they ask you to tell them a little about yourself, do you automatically lead with your job title?  If so, why?  We are so much more.  We are captains of our own universe, stewards of this beautiful planet and so on….

I am curious, what your thoughts are on this subject?

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EVICTION DAY

December 14, 2016 was eviction day.  I woke up to mixed emotions.  It was going to be the end of a long ordeal; so I thought.  Once the day was over, I was supposed to be able to breathe.  I knew I would still have feelings of hurt and sadness but at least some of the stress would be unloaded.  You see, I was not the one being evicted.  I was doing the evicting.  It had been a long process that had taken months.  It should have never come to this point.  There were lawyer fees, court fees, tears and too many sleepless nights.

Why Was I Sad?  

The person I was evicting was my brother.  Yep, you read correctly.  More detail on that relationship on another post, maybe.  Not ready to talk about it yet.  May never be able to share.  Still hurting.

The day began as scheduled, than I got the call at work.  Hey Kim, I Living roomthink the house is on fire.  I am around the corner but it has to be the house.  I know they are being evicted today.  I will go check it out.  Than the pictures came through via text…It was the house.  Than the Sheriff called and was like oh the house is on fire…..And so on and so on.  Fear came over me.  I felt helpless.  The only thing I cared about was that everyone was okay.  Thank God everyone was okay.

It’s funny, many people did not realize what I was going through in 2016. And this situation was just one of the trials.  They say God does not give you more than what you can handle.  I believe this to be true for both good situations and bad.  Apparently, God felt that I could handle the valleys.  I have mentioned God a few times in this post.  Yes, I am a believer.  However, let me be transparent and not front.  No, I do not go to Church as much as I should.  No, I am not in the word daily.  Yes, I sometimes curse like a sailor etc…I am a work in progress.  I won’t judge you and please don’t judge me.  I just believe that it was faith in a higher power which I call God that truly got me through the valley.  I also believe that I have work to do to prepare me for all my blessings to come.  Let the healing and the work begin!

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